Otto von Bismarck, the famed Chancellor of 19<sup>th century Germany, is famously said to have remarked that in life there are two things that it is better not to know how they are made: laws and sausages.

Watching the first episode of the new series of "The Apprentice" I can't help but feel the old man was right, as the boy's team, "Synergy" made their cheap, minimum meat content sausages for the task set for them by Lord Sugar (previously known as Sir Alan until Gordon Brown got involved).

Speaking as a great fan of sausages though I'm not surprised that the team still managed to make a profit, albeit £15 less than the girl's team "Apollo" made with their top-notch gourmet sausages.

But enough with sausages, how were the teams? Well as we've come to expect from The Apprentice there are a fair few big mouths loudly singing their own praises.

The biggest mouth of them all, a self-styled entrepreneur named Dan Harris, boldly put himself forward to be team leader of "Synergy" for the first task, while Joanna Riley, who makes much of her simplicity and humble beginnings, took charge of "Apollo".

Harris previously appeared in Steven Spielberg's "Saving Private Ryan" as an extra, it is stated on the Apprentice website. Unfortunately his leadership style seemed more akin to that shown in "Downfall", rather than "Saving Private Ryan", and it was certainly a thousand miles "Band of Brothers".

Many of his team mates complained that their organisation seemed chaotic and some even accused Harris of "bullying". He was also amusingly called "arrogant" by a young man named Stuart Baggs, who failed to see the irony of such a comment given that he describes himself as "a brand".

Riley appeared to be much more collegiate and the ladies team generally seemed to get on better than the boys. However there was one notable run in between Riley and Melissa Cohen, a food business manager, who insisted on finishing a large sale of sausages to a local restaurant in an apparent bid to get some brownie points with Lord Sugar should she end up in the boardroom.

When all was said and done it was the boys who came off worse, despite making a profit of over £305, it was not enough to beat the girls profit of £320.

Harris took Baggs and self proclaimed "maverick" Alex Epstein into the boardroom to meet Lord Sugar. While Epstein appeared at risk from being fired by Lord Sugar, simply by virtue that he did not seem to do much, in the end it was Harris who got the finger of death as, in Lord Sugar's words, "Not one person came to his support out of the whole seven people [in his team] that's got to give you a message".

So Downfall it was for Harris.

However Baggs also should watch out as Lord Sugar added, "This young lad Stuart though, I mean, he's also a handful and I was half way to getting rid of two of them today to be honest with you. I have to tell you I'm not putting up with him for much longer."

Incidentally Bismarck served in the Prussian army during its many victories against the Austro-Hungarians, Danes and French, despite never having got a scholarship to Sandhurst. He was later fired as Chancellor however by Wilhelm II for trying too hard to avoid war, something Kaiser the new Kaiser was not famed for.

Germany