General election aftermath: Who was the best prime minister the UK never had?

A mere three days after the defenestration of Ed Miliband, the thankless task of rehabilitating his reputation has already begun.

During the weekend, Britain's newspapers, politicians from across the spectrum and good old Joe and Josephine Public have been ripping the former Labour leader to shreds. Now, just as it seems he was about to dissolve into a mist of his own blood, Ed's Milifanclub has bitten back.

According to one of Miliband's fans, Ed's a truly great man - just wilfully misunderstood. By the electorate (too dim to see his genius), by the media (nasty old Murdoch, brainwashing the proles!) and all too soon by the history books. Wallace - sorry, Ed - is the best prime minister we never had.

It's a big claim, and evidence is scant. How can you rate someone on what they haven't done? It's like asking who was the best manager England never had or the best rock band never to reach number one, except even more hypothetical.

At least football managers have some sort of record in football management; at least bands have some sort of record to go on. How can you judge a politician who has never done or achieved anything, and say he did it better than some other loser who never did anything either?

The only way to judge a politician is by their record, and by this measure, Ed measures up poorly.

His only experience of government was when Labour presided over the worst economic crisis since the 1980s (some say in 100 years but they obviously never grew up under Thatcher).

He became leader by doing the dirty on his own brother and most people, if asked to think of a single issue over the last five years about which Ed offered a fresh take, a vision, would struggle.

Coincidentally - or perhaps not - my kids attend the same school as Ed's. I saw him this morning, looking sheepish, embarrassed; a humble, decent man and a kind, loving parent no doubt (Ed, I mean, not me).

But if he's the best PM we never had I'll eat Paddy Ashdown's hat. In fact - it's pretty hard to think of anyone worse.

So here are just 10 of the many people I believe would make a better PM than poor old "Better Red and Dead" Milibean:

George Galloway.

Jeffrey Archer.

The scary one out of The Chase. (All right - any of them).

Vernon Kaye.

Joey Essex.

Jona Lewie.

Former Birmingham City manager Jim "Bald Eagle" Smith.

That woman who threw a cat in a wheelie bin.

Ricky and Bianca out of EastEnders.

Spit the Dog.

Anyway reader, these are MY top 10... so who are yours?

(Please don't write in.)